Christmas is here, where did the time go?
Got to load up the reindeer, put on my red suit and go
I use to like Christmas, but every year it gets worse
Gettin` gift to six billion people is just too much damn work
Got the Christmas blues, man this job is killin` me
And most of these stupid new houses don`t even have chimneys
I use to be jolly, now I`m depressed
Had a twinkle in my eye, now I`ve got a bullet proof vest
Cuz if the pace don`t kill me, some gun totin` yahoo will
They keep on shootin` at me like I`m some sort of big fat red criminal
Got the Christmas blues, I`m starting to see
That I gotta be some sort of loser to get paid in milk and cookies
Man, I hate kids, especially their letters
Cuz I always give `em some stuff, man, but they always say they want somethin` better
Well, maybe I`m getting cranky cuz I`m gettin` old
But I just feel like giving all them stupid little brats great big lumps of coal
I got the Christmas blues, man, enough`s enough
Next year you can find some other sucker to deliver all this stuff
I got the Christmas blues, I tell you, I`m gonna quit
Gonna find me a steady job with good benefits
Ho ho ho? I don`t think so!