Phony Calls — текст песни (Weird Al Yankovic)

Mom and dad are goin` out for the evening
And you`re stuck inside the house all alone
That`s when you decide it might be fun to harrass someone
Dial a random number up on your telephone
You ask if their refrigerator is running
Then you tell `em they should go out and catch it
Buddy, if they ever figured out where you were callin` `em from
They`d come and bust your head right in with a ratchet
Listen to me

Don`t go makin` phony calls
Please stick to the seven-digit numbers you`re used to
I know that you think it`s funny drivin` folks right up the wall
But it`s really gettin` old fast

Little Melvin has a natural obsession
Askin` for Prince Albert in a can
He gets a kick each time he makes a collect call
To some guy he doesn`t know who lives in Japan
He`s callin` strangers up at three in the morning
Gives `em pizza pie delivery at four
He won`t be laughin` when they`re tracin his line
One day the phone police will be there at his door
Yo, hear me

Don`t go makin` phoney calls
Only dial the seven-digit numbers you`re used to
Swear someday I`m gonna yank that phone cord right out from the wall
How long is this phase gonna last?
Come on

[Moe :] Moe`s Taverne - Where the elite meet to drink.
[Bart:] Uh, yeah, hello, is Mike there? Last name Rotch.
[Moe :] Hold on; I`ll check.
[Moe :] My crotch! My crotch! Hey, has anybody seen my crotch lately?
[others laughing]
[Moe :] Listen to me, you little puke.
[Moe :] One of these days, I`m gonna catch you
[Moe :] And I`m gonna carve my name on your back with an icepick!
[Bart laughing]

Don`t go makin` phoney calls
Only dial the seven-digit numbers you`re used to
You went through the New Yourk City phone book and prank-called `em all
Hope that you grow out of this fast
Grow out of this fast...

Don`t go makin` phoney calls
Only dial the seven-digit numbers you`re used to
But you think it`s funny drivin` folks right up the wall
But it`s really gettin` old fast