They say to have her hair done Liz flies all the way to France
And Jackie`s seen in a discotheque doin` a brand new dance
And the White House social season should be glittering and gay
But here in Topeka the rain is a fallin`
The faucet is a drippin` and the kids are a bawlin`
One of them a toddlin` and one is a crawlin` and one`s on the way
I`m glad that Raquel Welch just signed a million dollar pact
And Debbie`s out in Vegas workin` up a brand new act
While the TV`s showin` Newlyweds a real fun game to play
But here in Topeka the screen door`s a bangin`
The coffee`s boilin` over and the wash needs a hangin`
One wants a cookie and one wants a changin` and one`s on the way
Now what was I doin` Jimmy get away from there darn there goes the phone
Hello honey what`s that you say you`re bringin` a few ole buddies home
You`re callin` from a barn get away from there
No not you honey I was talkin` to the baby wait a minute honey the door bell
Honey could you stop at the market and hello hello well I`ll be
The girls in New York City they all march for women`s lib
And Better Homes and Gardens shows the modern way to live
And the pill may change the world tomorrow but meanwhile today
Here in Topeka the flies are a buzzin`
The dog is a barkin` and the floor needs a scrubbin`
One needs a spankin` and one needs a huggin` Lord one`s on the way
Oh gee I hope it ain`t twins again