Roommates — текст песни (Jimmy Fallon)

*Go back ::scratch:: Go back ::scratch::
Go back to ur dorm, an u got ur roommate.. that never werks out. That never
werks out.. they don`t want it to work out. They want it like its a real world
episode in ur dorm room. Like I, uh, Like I don`t understand like they hav the
compatibility tests you fill out at the beginning of the year... thats such a
joke with that test u fill out at the beginning of the year. It`s like "Umm I
like rock and roll. I like stayin up late, and I love the ladies! oh yeah oh
hoo" "Okay we got the perfect room mate for u. He`z an opera major,he`z an
arptileptic, an he`z gay so go fight each other. we got four camera angles.
That`ll be perfect, welcome to college, go screw urself." "HUH?" "Yeah, thats
what we say here, go ahead." Then u think urslef, "Okay I got it beat, i got it
beat, my buddy from high skool`s comn up, hez gonna be my room mate, its gonna
be awesum." No, that is never awesum. It doesn`t work out. No it doesn`t. Hate
to tell ya, u will fight each other, u will jes get, u will get, ill tell ya
why one of is cuz they have too much dirt on u. You`r friend from home has too
much dirt on u, they`ll kill u they`ll crush u in an argument for no reason.
Like u jes say "hey man, uh, these dishes hav been in the sink for like 2 weeks
man, an their ur dishes, are u gonna clean em or wat?" Yeah remember when u had
crabs in 6 grade? (audience laughter) I fair to bring up my crabs?