Ant: Well, mate. Well, that`s, that`s our first album...
Dec: That seems to be it, man.
Ant: That`s - what do they call it - a wrap, mate.
Dec: That`s a wrap.
Ant: Literally!
Dec: Literally?
Ant: Yes, well that`s our first album done, mate!
Dec: Right, yeah.
Ant: Well done!
Dec: I, I, I, I can`t, I can`t believe...
Ant: I can`t believe you`re stuttering like that...
Dec: I can`t believe we`ve broke The Beatles` record, mate.
Ant: What? What`s that?
Dec: Well, they did their first album in 14 hours, do you know that?
Ant: Yeah.
Dec: I didn`t believe it was possible to do an album in 37 and
a half minutes!
Ant: Actually, it is, mate.
Dec: I, I, I`m just amazed...
Ant: No, no, I think, I think Peter Gabriel done his in 32.
Dec: Awww...
Ant: So we haven`t even broke the record, at all have we?
Dec: He`s just beaten us then.
Ant: Eh? Eh?
Dec: Hey, but I think we`ve done well though!
Ant: Yeah it`s, it`s, you know, you know I`m pleased...so what
you gonna do now then?
Dec: Erm...I think I`ll go...
Ant: Apart from change that shirt, maybe, because I`ve been in
this recording studio for, what, 30 minutes? 30 odd minutes?
It`s beginning, I didn`t wanna bring it up, mate, but it`s beginning
to smell a bit.
Dec: Thanks Ant. Erm, I dunno, I think I`ll go back to...
Ant: No, no, you`re not even gonna tell us if you`re gonna change
the shirt or not?
Dec: Yeah I`ll change the shirt...
Ant: And have a wash, too?
Dec: I`ll put on me uniform for me proper job, actually.
Ant: What`s your proper job?
Dec: I erm, I collect the trolleys at Tescos.
Ant: Do you?
Dec: Yeah.
Ant: I`m a, I`m a, I`m a milkman.
Dec: Really?
Ant: Yeah. Very exciting, it`s true what they say, you know.
Dec: What`s that then?
Ant: It`s true what they say about milkmen.
Dec: That you get lots of free milk?
Ant: Yeah. I do.
Dec: Cool. Brilliant. But, erm...
Ant: The old people round near mine are really pleased.
Dec: Yeah.
Ant: Yeah. Hello Thomas, there`s your pint. Hello Esther, there`s
your pint. You know, it`s a daily round every morning, mate,
after me normal round, it`s a daily round...
Dec: Well, Anthony!
Ant: Yeah...I`m sorry, you know, you see, that`s why I don`t
even tell anyone! `Cause they`re not even interested!
Dec: We should carry on this conversation later on...
Ant: OK, OK. OK!
Dec: But, erm, so what do you think people are gonna make of all this then?
Ant: I, I don`t know, I don`t know, I enjoyed it though, surely,
I mean, you know...
Dec: I`ve enjoyed it too, but you know, how are people gonna take it?
Ant: What d`you mean?
Dec: Well, how`re they gonna, how`re they...
Ant: They`re (whistles) ooh, what`s that guy`s problem?
Dec: But are they gonna like it?
Ant: What?
Dec: The album?
Ant: Well I hope so. I mean, or all this hard work`s been in
vain! All this 37 minutes has been in vain, mate! Did we say
37?
Dec: 37, yeah!
Ant: Ah right! OK!
Dec: Don`t mention the 3 weeks it did take though!
Ant: (Laughs)
Dec: Err, yeah, 37 and a half minutes!
Ant: Yeah, right. Er, yeah, I hope so, mate, I hope so. You know,
I mean I hope for your sake.
Dec: Well I might see you round Tesco sometime, mate.
Ant: Yeah, I mean, I mean that`s it now, isn`t it?
Dec: Erm, actually we`ve got a bit of bad news to stick on the
end of here for everybody that`s listening to the CD.
Ant: Yeah.
Dec: This is actually the err, the last professional engagment
me and Ant are actually erm...
(Recording studio door opens)
Cleaner: That`s it, mind out the way boys.
Dec: Oh sorry, love.
Ant: Sorry love.
Cleaner: You still `ere?
Ant: We`ve got an interesting to thing to...
Dec: We`ve got an important...
Cleaner: Come on, mind out the way. I`ve gotta clean up in `ere...
Ant: Please, please, no, no, love...love...
Dec: We`ve got an important...we`ve got an important...
(Scuffles)
Dec: We`ve got an important announcement to make.
Ant: Thanks for that extra biscuit at teatime!
Studio Operator: Hurry up, boys.
Ant: Anyway, anyway...
Dec: This is the last professional engagement we`re gonna, err,
engage in, and we actually are...
Studio Operator: Here, hurry up, boys!
Ant: We`re, we`re, the truth is we`re splitting up...
Both: After this album.
Ant: So, this is our last album, so...
Dec: We just wanna thank everyone who supported us along the way...
Ant: It`s our first and last so, err...
Dec: We are gonna, err, persue sort of careers now, both in television
and in music, so we just want to thank everyone who supported
us as a duo...
Ant: Yeah.
Dec: And a twosome.
Ant: So is this the last they`ll hear of PJ & Duncan?
(Silence)
Both: PSYCHE!!
(Manic laughter)
