Hangin` with my sweet amour
She came out with a lion`s roar
Yellin` I`m goin` to the corner store,
Be back at quarter to four
Don`t slam you pinkies in the drawer
She can be like a maiden from the days of yore
Hangin` out at Studio 54
Break-dancin` on the slick, brick disco floor
With Lionel Richie
Who, by the way, was a Commodore
One time she gave mouth-to-mouth to a snaggle-tooth boar
Who couldn`t breathe right since the Vietnam War
Then she played Chinese Checkers with Skeletor
And went camping with Eva Gabor
She`s my sweet Beatrice
She`s my sweet Beatrice
She`s my sweet Beatrice
And, she`s coming home
I got a picture of her down by the seashore
Wearing a bikini made of purple velour
Her hair`s up like Conway Twitty`s pompadour
With the smile of Guy LeFleur
She got the ups and the downs like an elevator
But deep inside she`s a marshmallow s`more
Can bake a cake as big as Jupitor
Either/or, neither/nor
She`ll share it with your Labrador
She can run faster than a blazing meteor
Loves Winnie the Pooh and his friend Eeyore
Can make a pipe out of an apple core
That`s a trick she learned from Roberto Parrish
Down in Ecuador
You know why?
She`s my sweet Beatrice
She`s my sweet Beatrice
She`s my sweet Beatrice
And she`s coming home
Well, for sure, she opened the door
Whipped out a three-foot fishing lure
Sexually, that made me feel insecure
Like the time I was a roadie
On Elton John`s tour
She said Let`s go catch some Piscatore!
I said Beatrice, you don`t eat fish no more
She said By G-d, you`re right!
So we took ourselves a snore
And when we woke up 10 hours later
We made Love Du Jour
She`s my sweet Beatrice
She`s my sweet Beatrice
She`s my sweet Beatrice
And she came home
She likes to clean out the attic every now and then
She`s gonna knit me a brand new golfing bag
We gonna watch ourselves a John Wayne movie
Then we gonna free all the doggies at the kennel
She gonna try on my third grade mittens
She`ll keep `em on even though they`re way to small
Well, she ain`t never gonna hurt me
She ain`t never gonna let me down
She ain`t never gonna tell nobody
I`m afraid of birds and spiders
Well,
Bea-Bea-Bea-Beatrice
Bea-Bea-Bea-Beatrice
Bea-Bea-Bea-Beatrice
Bea-Bea-Bea-Beatrice
Bea-Bea-Bea-Beatrice
Bea-Bea-Bea-Beatrice
And she loves Pat Summerall
