Me an` Earl was workin` the superslab outside a` that Ogallala?
When outta town come a local clown in a `65 Impala
Had a `coon tail flyin` off a` his whip antenna
We was haulin` a load a` them go-go girls
Truckin` `em over to O-town
Old boy got on his microphone
Says "How`s about a little showdown?"
Well, hot damn, I`m a gamblin` man,
So ev`rybody get yer bets down
`Cause this old truck gonna make us a buck
Chicken in the bread pan, pickin` out vittles
Swing them heifers and away we go
Wake up, Earl, we gots to race that pile a` junk over ta North Platte city
Well, one-eyed bears and deuces wild
We got the back door pad-locked
He says, "Bet five bucks and a side a` beef,
"I can beat them cows ta Flat Rock."
You hear that, Earl? He says he`s gonna whip Ol` Bessie here!
I says, "Call your five and raise ya ten
"Jes` kiss that Chevy goodby, boy
"`Cause when Bessie hits that floatin` gear
"You gonna be eatin` Hereford pie. Yeah."
Well, hot damn, I`m a gamblin` man,
So ev`rybody get yer bets down
`Cause this old truck gonna make us a buck
She gonna round them curves at thirty gees
A trunk full a` cows an` a hood full a` bees
Move it up a notch, Earl.
Yeah, that`s it. That`s floatin` gear! C`mon Bessie!
Well, tuck it on in and head it for the barn
If we don`t win, we gonna sell the farm
If this old wreck don`t break my neck,
We gonna take them cows to a discatheque
I says, "Come on, Earl, let`s give it a whirl.
"That Chevy is a-pickin` up speed."
Well, we crossed the Platte at a hundred flat
Old Bessie was a-blowin` the weeds
We definitely was in that Monfort lane.
Yeah, we won the race with a bovine ace
When the Chevy made a fatal pass
Yeah, he got too close
Got a terminal dose a` that good ol` Hereford gas.
Phew!
Hot damn, I`m a gamblin` man,
So ev`rybody get yer bets down
`Cause this old truck`s gonna make us a buck
She`s rollin` the boulevard shakedown
Hot damn, I`m a truckin` man
And I sorta like ta put my foot down
This old rig gonna blow your wig
Got go-go girls and a Peterbilt cab
Gonna see ya all out on the superslab for a showdown
