"how you doin, bert? " "well, not so good, charlie,
My backs gone out and I got my finger cut gnarly.
The jobs the same, and sos the boss.
Hes still a big ass, and my wallet got lost.
My wifes sick in bed, she says shell never get well.
And all these kids today have gone to hell.
And all that government paperwork caught up with mecc
Had to hire a beancounter for an outrageous fee.
And I dont know if the chicken or the egg is to blame
But all things considered, I guess I cant complain."
"cheer up," charlie said, "things could be worse."
"well, yeah, I know, but did I tell ya that
My landlords a cop? my neighbors insane?
But all things considered, I guess I cant complain."
Chorus:
Out on the water
Where the sailing men all go
The waters high,
While all the fish swim low
Out on the water
Where the sailing men all go
The waters high,
While all the fish swim low
"you know what, bert? " charlie said, "youve got the wrong attitude.
Sometimes lifes a big game, and the paths, you can choose.
Things may go wrong, but youve gotta stand tall."
"well, I know," bert said, "but well, that aint all.
My hairs fallin out. the roof leaks when it rains.
But all things considered, I guess I cant complain."
Chorus repeat
"you know what, bert? " charlie said, "youre a real loser.
So Ill see you next weekccif you live til then."
As bert walked out to the sidewalk, ten floors up
Two men lost control of a hoist at just the right time
And a big steinway grand flattened bert like a dime.
And as a crowd gathered round and asked, what was his name?
And could it be the chicken, or the egg to blame?
Well, the only thing heard was that he couldnt complain.
So if youre a loser in life, and your guns outta ammo,
Just remember the story of bert and the piano.
cause if you cant string the bowccand youre clean outta rosin1
Someone may have planned for a music lesson.
Keep your eyes to the sky; it could be a brand name
And remember, all things considered, you really cant complain.