I met her at the `Sailor Arms`
A bar down by the docks
Full of prostitutes and deviants
And fellows wearing frocks
Went there to drown my sorrow
My misery and paaaiiiiaaaiiiiaan
With fourteen multicoloured pills
And a pint of heavy ale
(heavy ale)
And I saw this girl across the way
Who was smiling through the wine
So I begged her come on over
Come on over, spend some time
And I spilled my life before her
And she seemed to understand
Although she was a girl
We were talking man to man
(man to man)
[Chorus]
For love is where you find it
Wherever that may be
For me it was in the Sailors Arms
At twenty-five past three
There`s something strange about her
I can`t put my finger on
But I wanna tell the world
That she`s the one
(she`s the one)
I wanna tell the world
That she`s the one
She strolled up to the toilets
She strolled into the Gents
I asked her why she did it
Why she`d gone to pay the rent
We arm-wrestled and I lost
She beat me with a spike
Told me filthy jokes
That were quite unlady-like
(lady-like)
It was four in the morning
And through the smokey haze
I could`ve been mistaken
But she needed to shave
(to shave)
[Chorus]
For love is where you find it
Wherever that may be
For me it was in the Sailors Arms
With a better man than me
Her husky voice seduced me
My heart was in a mess
I sat upon her knee
As something twitched beneath her dress
There`s something more than knees beneath her dress
You`ve got nice eyes says I
(Oh Sir, I am suprised)
What large hands I said
(All the better to touch you with)
God, you arms look strong
(A woman`s work is never done)
Your legs are quite hirsuite
(Aren`t you the saucy one!)
I was feeling less than stable
When she said her name was Ken
(Ken!)
Well if I had suspicions
Lord I should`ve had `em then
(then!)
She cried as she told me
How she was so confused
One more visit to the doctor
She`d have nothing left to lose
(Toulouse-Lautrec)
I ran my fingers through her wig
She lightly stroked my hair
She said she was a man
(Whoa whoa! She said she was a man?
A man called Ken - Bull-twang!)
Lots of men are called Ken.
(So what did you say?)
I told her I don`t care
(He doesn`t care)
[Chorus]
For love is where you find it
Wherever that may be
For me it was in a hopper bin
With my trousers `round my knees
There`s something strange about her
I just put my finger on
And I want to tell the world
That she`s the one
(he`s the one)
I want to tell the world
That its the one.
