(marvin hamlisch/ed kleban)
It was then I decided to call the doctor
For my appointment to buy what?
Tits and ass, shall I buy a fancy pair?
Tightened up that derriere
Did the nose with it, all that goes with it
Tits and ass, you can knock and someones there
Shake the new maracas and youre fine
Tits and ass, can change your life
Would they change mine
Wouldnt cost a fortune, neither
Wouldnt hurt my sex life either
Its a gas, I have never seen a pair
Chorus girl or movie star or wife
Tits and ass, oh yeah, t and a
Tits and ass can change your life