Just when I thought everything would be okay
Just when I started to believe that everything was going my way
Out came the cloud from under my feet
Crashing back down to reality
You used to call me pumpkin now I`m Halloween
Remember when I used to be your jelly bean
You used to call me schnookums and shit like that
Now you`re after me with a baseball bat
I remember when I used to be the king
Your honey sweety darling baby everything
I used to be your tall dark mystery man
Now I`m just straight up history man
Just when I thought everything would be alright
Just when I started to believe that everything was out of sight
You left me with nothing but a scribbled note
That said I would no longer be your love boat
From here on out my pet name would be X
Your X your X your X
It used to be sugar then it turned into salt
I used to rock your world now I`m standing on a fault line
Lying naked in a hail storm in the dark
You`re my little tornado and I am your trailer park
You used to call me names too cute to repeat
Like honey bunch hairy bear and piccolo peet
Goochy goochy goo gaga shit like that
Now you`re after me screaming you dirty rat
I don`t remember applying for a name change
So why is it you`re calling me Mister Deranged
Psycopathic pornographic stinking drunk
Failing fast lying ass worthless punk
You used to call me sweety pie and baby doll
I guess another stud`s kicking in my stall
You`ll probably call him superman or loverboy
You`ll probably disregard him like a broken toy
Just when he thought everything was going his way
Just when he started to believe that everything was hunky dory
He`ll look at that cloud that he`s standing on
And with an itsy bitsy teeny little almost inaudible squeak
He`ll notice
It`s gone
From here on out his pet name would be X
Your X your X your X
Sweety pie?
No X
Honey bunch?
No X
Bubble butt?
No X
Pumpkin face?